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    青春萌動的味道

    時間:2016-09-05 / 點擊:次 / 文章投稿

      上初中一年級時,教代數的宋老師一頭披肩的長發,一雙烏黑的大眼睛忽閃忽閃,像是夜空中亮晶晶的星星。每當上代數課,我都會盯著她一眼不眨地看,心里不知多少次驚嘆過她的美,這樣美的老師一定會有一位英俊的白馬王子吧。

      一天,我看到一個外表普通、留著絡腮胡子、矮胖的男人來找宋老師,看他們倆親密的樣子,難道這就是宋老師的愛人,不會吧?后來,我聽到的消息證實了我的猜想。原來,宋老師從小家庭貧困,但她刻苦好學,終于以優異的成績考上了某師范大學。可一貧如洗的家根本無力供她上大學,宋老師哭紅了眼睛,連自殺的念頭都有了。正當宋老師為交學費犯愁時,是做家電生意的鄰居劉軍替她交了學費。劉軍比宋老師大5歲,初中沒畢業就輟了學,但他頭腦靈活,很快就學會了家電維修,在縣城一家商場的一角租了個攤位,邊賣家電邊修家電。由于劉軍技術過硬,誠信至上,贏得了用戶的青睞,生意越做越紅火。他致富不忘鄉鄰,經常幫助鄉親們擺脫困境。當他獲悉宋老師為交學費犯愁時,憐憫之心油然而生,便毫不猶豫地實施了資助行動。就這樣,宋老師的大學學業全部是在劉軍的資助下完成的,畢業后青春貌美的宋老師成了劉軍的新娘……

      聽完這個真實的故事,我很替宋老師惋惜,我不知道宋老師是否真正愛這個男人。但她的“義舉”卻著實感動了我,再上代數課時,我對宋老師又多了一份崇拜,我開始喜歡并瘋狂地愛上了代數課,很快成了班里的代數課代表。每當我抱著全班同學的代數作業去宋老師辦公室,我的心里都有一種說不出的高興,宋老師的一顰一笑都深深地印在我的腦海里。我幻想著也會和宋老師有同樣的“艷遇”,只是我的“劉軍”不知何時出現?

      生活往往是捉弄人的,沒想到,我很快就有了我的“劉軍”。上初二時,班里來了一位剛畢業的物理老師,姓涂,高大清瘦,棱角分明,陽光帥氣,只是他總是穿著那身洗得發白的牛仔服。聽同學私下議論,涂老師家并不富裕,父母靠借貸供他上完大學,可這并不影響涂老師的魅力。體育場上他打籃球的俊朗身影一直吸引著眾多女生的目光,我也暗暗地喜歡上了涂老師。涂老師對我也很好,我感覺上課時他總是盯著我看,直看得我心里突突地跳。于是,我開始努力學習物理,又兼做了物理課代表。因為每天能見到宋老師和涂老師,我快樂得像個無拘無束的燕子一樣飛來飛去,我的成績也因我的快樂心情越來越好,我夢想著有一天能像宋老師一樣考上師范大學。

      很快到了三年級,涂老師跟班,宋老師卻還是教初中一、二年級的代數課,我不再去宋老師辦公室了,可宋老師的身影一直揮之不去,甚至我學著她的樣子,有時把頭發柔順地披在肩上,有時高高地扎起……而我與涂老師之間似乎也很有默契,涂老師經常會拍拍我的肩膀:“英子,好好學習,你會有出息的。”這句話一直激勵著我向著我的理想努力。期末,我同時收到了高中和中專的錄取通知書,父母堅持讓我上中專,說能早一天端上鐵飯碗,我卻堅持上高中,因為我想馳騁更廣闊的空間。父母的臉色越來越難看,我終于遭受了和宋老師一樣的命運,我面臨著上高中與上中專抑或二者都放棄的選擇。我不知道我的堅持使父母承受了何等巨大的壓力,父親一夜之間竟然急白了頭,一面是女兒的前程,一面是窘迫的生活。最后,父母東挪西借,還是沒湊夠我高一的學費。淚水每天都洗刷著我的臉,我的心也如刀割一般,我對未來由失望變成了絕望。臨開學的前一天,我拿著高中錄取通知書愁眉不展時,涂老師來了,還是那身洗得發白的牛仔服,還是那樣的陽光帥氣。他拿出厚厚的一個信封,鄭重地交到父親的手上,對我說:“英子,上高中吧,以后你每年的學費,我想辦法解決,你會有出息的。”我不知哪來的勇氣,緊緊地握住涂老師的手:“涂老師,你放心吧,我會用我的方式報答你的。”

      后來,我就坐在了縣城一高明亮的教室里。在涂老師的資助下,三年的高中生活緊張忙碌地度過了,我如愿以償地考上了夢寐以求的大學。那一天,涂老師破天荒地在我們鄉里中心街上一家小面館里請了我和我的父母,看得出,涂老師很激動,還和父母親喝了一點白酒。就這樣,帶著涂老師的期望,我飛到了另一個城市開始了大學生涯。

      幾乎在大學的每一個禮拜日,我都會給涂老師寫信,有時說說我的成績,有時說說學校,有時說說我所在的這個城市。涂老師不經常回信,即使回信也是寥寥數語,只是我的學費和生活費,他從沒有忘記過,總是及時地寄到學校。大一暑假,我見到了涂老師,涂老師帶我到母校院墻外的小溪邊捉螃蟹,看著那些橫七豎八的小怪物,驚得我不住地尖叫,這時,涂老師就會興奮得像個孩子,特別有勁地喊:“英子,快點來呀,這邊還有更大的。”涂老師富有磁性的聲音逗得我開懷大笑。和涂老師在一起的日子快樂而充實,很長一段時間,涂老師的聲音都在我的耳邊響起,很多個夜晚我都是在涂老師叫我的聲音中甜滋滋地入夢、甜滋滋地笑醒,我發現我真的離不開涂老師了,他成了我生命中最重要的人,可我不知道涂老師對我是否有感覺。

      大二時,班里開始有人談戀愛,也有男孩子給我遞紙條,可我一點心情也沒有,我心里只有涂老師。于是我寫給涂老師的信便發生了變化,我直言不諱地告訴涂老師,我喜歡他,要嫁給他,讓他一定要等我畢業。涂老師仍舊像以前一樣,不咸不淡地應付我。難道我不夠漂亮,我盯著鏡中的自己看,我看到了出水芙蓉一般逐漸成熟的自己,忽然冒出了一個奇怪的想法。周末,我用涂老師給我的生活費上街買了一個胸罩和一條裙子,去照相館拍了一組個人生活照,寄給了涂老師,我就不信他不喜歡我洋溢著青春氣息的身軀。信寄出后,我一直忐忑不安地等涂老師的信。果然,涂老師很快回信了,不過連我的照片一齊寄了過來,信里短短的幾句話讓我流了一夜的淚:“英子,你長大了,你應該是一個展翅高飛的雄鷹,你很有個性,你會有更加光明的未來,好好努力。”

      我的痛苦不言而喻,我又想起了宋老師,我雖然沒有宋老師漂亮,可宋老師的運氣確實比我好,算了,既然老師說我是雄鷹,那我就應該有一雙堅強的翅膀,搏擊風雨,翱翔藍天。大二暑假,因為涂老師,我連家都沒有回,我做起了家教,再加上在學校勤工儉學的收入和獎學金,我基本上自己能養活自己了。我寫信告訴涂老師,別那么辛苦地給我寄錢了,借他的錢我會慢慢還的。

      不久后,父母給我來了一封信,說涂老師病了,讓我無論如何回家一趟。我心急火燎地回到了家,看到了病入膏肓的涂老師,他的臉像蠟一樣黃。原來涂老師為了還自己上學的債和供我上學,做了兩份家教,缺錢時還會賣血……涂老師患上了嚴重的肝硬化,涂老師的生命也快走到了盡頭……我哽咽著,一句話也說不出。怎么會這樣?涂老師在我印象中曾是那么的陽光帥氣。我發瘋一般撲向醫生辦公室,我跪在地上乞求涂老師的主治醫生,一定要想方設法救涂老師,我不能沒有他。醫生無力地搖搖頭,我癱在地上,仿佛看見死神在招手,我受不了一個鮮活的生命為了我在絢爛的風景里凋零……在涂老師最后的日子里,我見到了母校的好多老師,包括宋老師。宋老師還是那樣美麗,只是歲月不饒人,在她眼角留下了細細的皺紋。

      涂老師走后,我請了兩星期假,我每天都念著涂老師的名字,糊里糊涂地說些莫名其妙的話,后來又發起了高燒。母親流著淚勸我不能輕生,看見我難受她比我更痛苦。

      為了年齡越來越大的父母,我覺得我是哭干了眼淚以后挺了過來。隨著時間的流逝,我也找到了我的另一半,開始了一種新的生活。只是每每想起涂老師和宋老師,我心里總有一種隱隱的痛……

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